– Qamar uz Zama (B.E. Mech. Engg.)
Marriage is a sacred institution and a blessing from Allah which fosters love, companionship, responsibility and procreation within a lawful and harmonious relationship. Allah says in Quran, “And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed, in that are signs for a people who give thought” (Quran 30:21). This verse highlights the divine wisdom behind marriage, emphasizing the bond of love, compassion, and harmony that it brings to individuals and society as a whole.
But in the modern world, we are often bombarded with messages promoting the idea of complete independence. We’re told to be self-sufficient, self-reliant, and to strive for individual success without needing anyone else. We now live in a hyper-independent society that is totally individualistic and teaching us every day that only thing that matters is “individual’s feelings”. So why even maintain a “relationship” when you could satisfy your primal urges through short-term sexual “adventures” (Prone, Adultery, live-in-relationship etc)? If it’s all just about you and you alone, why even “bother” committing to a long-term relationship? this condition of the society is due to the SYSTEM.
Every 1 in 5 Children in the U.S. is being raised without a father
The system that exists in today’s secular countries is a liberal system. It pushes and promotes liberalism, which is maximizing personal liberty, freedom and equality. In other words, worshiping the self; being completely consumed with the individual at the expense of all else. Everything in a secular, liberal society revolves around the individual and the individual alone. The entire system is built on a foundation of selfishness, atomization and isolation that had led to men separating from their women, and parents getting separated from their children. The natural ties between people are severed, organic bonds are broken, normal relationships that are supposed to exist between human beings are destroyed.
An example that is prevalent in today’s society is ‘Single Mother’. According to U.S. Census Bureau, out of about 10 million single parent families with children under the age of 18, almost 80 percent were headed by single mothers. Today 1 in 5 children under the age of 18 — a total of about 15.7 million — are being raised without a father (Around half (51.4%) of single mothers have never married). There are many such examples, like increase in rape, drug addiction, and the list goes on. What is the result of all of these “rights,” hyper-focused on only the individual and their own momentary pleasures? The rights of all others are trampled underfoot! Children suffer and are abandoned, marriages suffer and die, families suffer and break down, society weakens, civilizations collapse.
Marriage is the Islamic solution to save the society from destruction
But what’s the alternatives? ISLAM! Islam has an entirely different system that meets all human needs; fulfills all the natural rights of all people; and organizes society in a way that beautifully aligns with our inherent human nature and does not destroy it. Islam deepens our intuitive love for our loved ones and nurtures our organic human relationships. But how? By creating an institution i.e. ‘Marriage’. Abdullah ibn Umar narrates that the Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم said: “Each of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. A ruler who rules over people is a shepherd and is responsible for them. The man is a shepherd over his family and is responsible for them. The woman is a shepherd over her husband’s home and children and is responsible for them”. Islam clearly defines the role and responsibility such as gender roles (where the husband has financial obligations and the wife is free to be a mother at home with her children); Birr al-Walidayn (excellence towards parents), which ensures respect for parents from their children; Silah al-Rahim (maintaining the ties of kinship), which assures the safety net and support network of extended family and relatives and also maintains ancestry.
Turning away from Allah’s Law leads to corruption on the earth as well as destroying family ties. It is crucial to recognize and appreciate the divine wisdom behind this divine institution (Marriage) and strive to build strong, harmonious marriages in order to experience the blessings that come with it in individual and collective life.
